Advice: First kisses

Someone on Formspring asked me for ¨first kiss advice¨.

First kisses can be one of the most amazing things you can experience. They can leave your head spinning and give you butterflies for days after, or they can be fucking horribly horrendous and something you NEVER want to do again. Then, they can be mediocre to the point where you have to BUILD the attraction.

One rule, never too soon!

You don't want to kiss them too soon for two reasons:

1. You don't want them to think you're more interested in kissing than you are interested in them.
2. You don't want them to think you like them a ton more than they like you, or they'll get scared

If they reciprocate your other physical gestures, such as holding hands, putting your arm around them, etc., then you can kiss them. However, don't kiss them immediately after you hold hands the first time! Do those other things for a few days to let the tension build until they are dying for you to kiss them!

The second biggest way you can blow a first kiss is to wait forever and miss too many opportunities. While it's good to let them wonder when you're going to do it (you want them to know you have confidence and are in control of yourself and the situation), if you wait for weeks and weeks and pass up too many opportunities, they're just going to move on.

First of all your posture should be open and comfortable/relaxed. Sit or stand close to them. Face them. Look at them, not at the ground. Don't cross your arms or lean away; or, instead of "kiss me" you'll be saying "piss off!"
I´m a bad one for this, because generally when I want to kiss someone I look at the ground and cross my arms, because, let´s face it - first kisses are scary as hell to some people. But, ignore me, haha! If you really like someone, just chill the fuck out and try to be comfortable.

People get so worked up on the whole ¨does he/she like me?¨ thing. Sure, if they don´t reciprocate your feelings it´s going to hurt, but when it all boils down to it you can´t make someone like you. I can´t make a boy or girl like me, just like someone can´t make me like them.
It has to be a mutual thing otherwise the other party is going to be think ¨Ewwww, fuck this.¨ and you are going to be left feeling hollow. So; NO FORCING FEELINGS ON OTHERS.
Just be straight up and honest.

Don't rush a kiss. Ever. You don't have to ask permission to kiss, but you will likely sense when it's the right time to lean in. A good way is to maintain eye contact and slowly lean in with your head. If your partner doesn't move away, he or she is ready to be kissed. Above all, don't be nervous. Billions of people have done this before you and billions more will. You can be excited, but don't forget that this is something that will most likely come naturally to you, so take your time and be cool about it.

Go with whatever feels right for you and hopefully the partner reciprocates. If you want to slip your tongue in, then do it - don´t jam it down their throat, just relax! If you want to nibble their lip, run your fingers through their hair, push them against a wall or hold their face with both hands, do it! It can´t always be like the movies, man!

Don´t plan it. Go with the moment. Have good hygiene.




xx